My Ego Nearly Destroyed Me

Welcome to this weeks newsletter - My Ego Nearly Destroyed Me

My Ego Nearly Destroyed Me

In my early twenties I was all ego.

Sleeping with whoever I wanted to.
Driving flash cars.
Spending all my money on luxury clothes and nights out.
Getting in fights all the time to prove myself.
And doing whatever I could to show off.

If you know my story, this led me into a bad place — overindulging in drink, drugs weekly, feeling lost, unfulfilled, and hating who I was as a person.

Eventually I got through this stage of my life but that doesn’t mean I detached from my ego.

I was achieving things for external validation.
Posting on social media for likes.
Aiming to gain success to prove myself yet again to others.

Guess what, only to feel unfulfilled again.

I’m not saying having a healthy ego is a bad thing — it’s not!
But when you’re living from your ego all the time, and your life revolves around external validation, proving your self-worth, and aiming to impress others…

It’ll be hard to be proud of yourself, validate yourself, and find true peace and fulfilment.

I’m not perfect, I still get lost in my ego sometimes but I’ve made massive progress and come a long way from where I used to be.

And it’s because of these 3 things I’ve been able to do so.

EGO KILLER ONE:

Know Your Intentions

Awareness is the first step to change.

It’s hard to change if you don’t know how to change.
This takes time, so be patient with yourself but it starts by understanding your intention behind everything you do.

If you’re about to post something on social media, ask yourself:
Why?
What is my intention behind this post?

Is it for likes? To impress? For external validation?
Or because you want to help others, gain business, connect, or inspire?

Let’s do another example.
Before you sign up for that half marathon, marathon, or challenge — ask yourself why.

Do I want to do this to prove I can? To show off? For validation?
Or do I want to do it to make myself proud, to prove to myself I can, to become someone greater?

Can you see the difference?
One feeds the ego.
The other feeds the soul.

I’ve been caught in that trap.
I’ve achieved great things but all for the wrong reasons.
I was doing it to impress, show off, and gain validation but it never sat right.
I felt like I needed to keep proving myself.

The shift happened when I started understanding my intentions and changing why I do what I do.

Now, I want to make myself proud, help and inspire others, and because I know my intentions are pure, I feel confident in myself and my actions.

My ego still creeps in sometimes, but when it does, I sit back, reflect, and check my why.

Moving forward, do the same before you:
Set that goal.
Post that post.
Buy that designer item or nice car.

Ask yourself:
What is my intention?
Is this for me?
Would I still do this if no one knew about it?

That small shift will change your confidence and your mindset.

EGO KILLER TWO:

Internal Validation

The ego feeds off external validation:
Likes.
Praise.
Recognition.
Anything that makes you feel like “the man.”

The opposite is internal validation — YOU recognising your own success.

Telling yourself you’re proud.
Counting your wins.
Celebrating your accomplishments.
Acknowledging your progress — big or small.

In my last blog, “How to Finally Feel Proud of Yourself,” I mentioned that I never used to self-validate because I thought it would boost my ego.

But I was wrong.

It only boosts your ego if your intentions aren’t pure.

If you self-validate to feel better than others, yes — that’s ego.
But if you self-validate to feel proud of yourself, to acknowledge how far you’ve come, to build self-belief — that’s growth.

The key to pushing the ego aside is simple: do it for you.

Run that marathon.
Post that post.
Build that business.
Buy the clothes.

Do it for yourself.
And once you’ve done it, don’t look outside for validation — give it to yourself.

There’s something powerful about wanting to be your best for you and only you.

Try it this week:
Spend time recognising how far you’ve come.
Celebrate your own growth.
Look at your goals and ask: are these truly for me?

EGO KILLER THREE:

You’re Not Good Enough

There’s nothing that humbles the ego more than saying:
You’re not good enough.

Now, I don’t mean as a human, we’re all good enough at our core.

But when you catch yourself thinking things like:
“Why aren’t I getting these results?”
“I’m better than that person.”
“I should be further ahead by now.”

Pause and say:
“I’m wrong. I’m not good enough yet.”

And that’s okay.

If you truly were, you’d already have the results, because results never lie.

If you haven’t:
Got the body you want,
Earned the money you want,
Achieve the goals you want,
Or built the life you want —

It means you’re not good enough yet to have them.

Because if you were, you would.

That shift — from “I deserve this” to “How can I get better?” changed everything for me.

When you’re stuck in the “I deserve this” mindset, you feel frustrated, rush, make mistakes, and ignore how far you’ve come.

It’s hard to say, but it’s the truth and the truth hurts.

If you want to step into your full potential, take a step back, reflect, and be honest with yourself.


The more honest you are, the better results you’ll get.

Final thoughts


As I said earlier, I spent years living through ego: chasing validation, trying to prove myself, showing off.
It left me unfulfilled and stuck in cycles.

I’m still not completely free from it, I drift sometimes.

But when I do, I take a step back.
I understand my intentions.
I self-validate.
And I remind myself I’m not as good as I think I am and that’s okay.

Because that mindset keeps me grounded, hungry, and humble.

It keeps my ego in check and helps me show up with the right intentions.

I hope it helps you do the same too.

Become the Best You.

Well done

Well done for showing up, reading this, and being ready to take action.

Most people say they want change — few actually do something about it.
You’re one of the few. 👏

I’d love to hear about your progress!


Reach out to me on and follow me on socials

If you need support, just message me.

Thanks,
Jack